by Suleika Jaouad and Seamus McKiernan If it takes a village to raise a child, you might say it also takes one to care for the sick. Cancer is at once personal and communal. Disease lives in the sufferer’s body, but the experience of illness is shared, often intimately, by our loved ones. And yet, caring for the sick can feel like writing a travelogue about a country you’ve never visited. You can’t know where you haven’t been. “What can I do to help?” This is the sincere, oft

I’ve been thinking a lot about “me” time lately—definitely wanting more of it and trying to figure out how to get it, without a whole lot of luck. It finally dawned on me that at least one of the reasons I was having so much difficulty was because I wasn’t clear in my own mind about what I really meant by “me” time, what specifically I wanted it to do for me, and how much of it I needed at any particular time. I am certainly not alone in wanting more time for myself. Every su

Take care of yourself. These words are so easy to say, yet we all know that finding the time and energy needed to “take care of you” is something that many family caregivers find impossible to do. In an attempt to provide some inspiration from the people who truly understand your challenges, we reached out to your fellow family caregivers and asked them what they do to take care of themselves and protect their own health. Here are a few of their responses: I make sure that I

Final Gifts: Understanding the Special Awareness, Needs, and Communications of the Dying By Maggie Callanan and Patricia Kelley When Someone You Love is Dying…it’s hard to know how to help, what to do, what to say. Yet if we know how to listen and what to look for, the dying themselves can often supply the answers, letting us know what they need to hear and express to allay their fears and face death with serenity. For more than a decade hospice nurses Maggie Callanan and Pat

Caregiving. The word brings to mind most beautiful images of compassion and self-sacrifice; cradling a newborn baby, comforting a person who is ill or dying, supporting someone who is bereaved. Healthy caregiving can bring out all that is best in us. And that is beautiful. But, there is another side to caregiving—a side we may not care to think about or talk about. Done without adequate rest or relief, caregiving becomes a chore and a drain. Done without proper knowledge and

Dear God, help me better understand and believe I can do what needs to be done. Forgive me for the times, even now, when I question your judgment. As I go about the many daily tasks of caregiving, give me energy. As I watch my loved one oh-so-slowly walk across the room, give me strength. As I answer his/her repeated question just one more time, give me patience. As I look for solutions to whatever is the most recent concern, give me wisdom. As I reminisce with him/her about